Idiots are trying to be hired in my team

After a few crazy weeks, now is time for me to inform you about my last encounters with idiots. I have been interviewing quite a few candidates for my new team and it turned out that idiots are trying to get a job from me.

Due to the lateness I took with that blog, I am only going to give a few highlights.

One of my colleague on the recruitment side tried to organize my team during an interview. He wanted me to give the applicants holidays between Christmas and New Year. One more genius who does not know what accounting is about. Has this guy ever heard about a yearly closing? He even escalated the issue to the management saying that "No really, you know, it's not that I want to interfere in something that's none of my business but 6 months without holidays it's too long." Luckily I had taken preventive actions on that one and the management agreed that it was indeed long but necessary to ensure that the new team was launched successfully. They added that as long as the candidates were informed and gave their consent it was not a problem.

But do not worry, the applicants are not better than the recruiter.

After I presented the job, I asked one of them if she had questions. "Yes" she answered and she started "What are you doing now?" I replied "What you'll be doing for Germany, I'm currently doing for the Netherlands" Her turn "How long have you been doing that?" "One year and a half" "That seems rather short to me for you to take this responsibility." Now that is a good one, I answered this question already when I was selected. Given that I am the one hiring she should probably consider that I did not do that bad.

Another candidate interrupted me while I described the position "I've red the offer." Well I hope he did, he applied after all but there are few things missing it. I know I wrote the offer and the blanks were left on purpose. We keep going on with the interview. I start a sentence to explain what accounting is about (Debit in an account is a credit in another one...) "I know that already". Too bad he was unable to put it into practice when I gave him the test. While leaving he told me "I'm sorry my accounting is a bit rusty." First of all it was not rusty it was non-existent, and second if I were him I would be more worried about my politeness than my accounting skills. None of the people have selected have experience in the field but at least they behaved properly.

A third applicant (unemployed for 6 months now) sent me an E-mail 18 minutes before his interview to inform me that due to some family emergency he could not come and would like when the next interview will be scheduled? Well never 18 minutes before the interview you should be drinking coffee somewhere in the area. If you actually have a problem go to the reception and I will see what we can do. 

A fourth and last example and I will stop this chronicle. An idiot sent me an E-mail that could be translated like this "Hi bastard, bastard I am French like you and my girlfriend told me you were hiring for a job for germany and so. I am a bit doing nothing in Buda since three years. I had interview but nonothing. Even a french guy refused to take. Can you take me bastard? I kind of manage a bit in German so I can help. I'm French and in deep shit. I need to get my hand on some cash bastard." Yeah sure I will take you, you exactly look like the kind of person I need to end up in trouble. Really the problem was not that he was French the problem was his French. I just hope for him it was a joke because I made him some great publicity in the hiring community.

GD